SEX: What Every Young Woman Needs to Know
An Aid to Dialogue Between Parent
and Child
A SEXDOC Book
William F. Fitzgerald, Ph.D.
First Edition
Menequil Press, San Jose, California
It is 58 physical pages (116 page sides) 8 1/2 inches by 11 inches, spiral bound and three-hole drilled with a pink cover (solid color, no printing) and a solid white back cover printed only with a bar code. It is designed to look as much as possible like a school subject notebook.
Disclaimer (link to the text)
Preface (link to an excerpt)
Acknowledgments
Technical Acknowledgments (link to the text)
To the Parent (link to an excerpt)
To the Young Woman (link to an excerpt)
Chapter One Using the correct words: Basic Anatomy (link to an excerpt)
Chapter Two Avoiding trouble: The "slanguage" of sex (link to an excerpt)
Chapter Three Avoiding unwanted pregnancy (link to an excerpt)
Chapter Four Feeling good while feeling guilty: Masturbation (link to an excerpt)
Chapter Five I didn’t take any clothes off: Petting (link to an excerpt)
Chapter Six You don’t have to swallow: Oral sex (link to an excerpt)
Chapter Seven Am I still a virgin?: Anal sex (link to an excerpt)
Chapter Eight Going all the way: Penile-vaginal intercourse (link to an excerpt)
Bonus: The KEGEL Exercise (link to the entire text)
Chapter Nine Cooties and bugs: Avoiding STDs (link to an excerpt)
Chapter Ten Boundaries and communication (link to an excerpt)
Chapter Eleven To Be or Not To Be (a virgin) (link to an excerpt)
Chapter Twelve The unfairness of it all (link to an excerpt)
Books and other information
Illustrations
Basic Human Female Sexual Anatomy (with "label lines")
Basic Human Female Pelvic Features
Basic Human Male Sexual Anatomy
Basic Human Female Sexual Anatomy (labeled)
Basic Human Female Pelvic Features (labeled)
Basic Human Female Sexual Anatomy (with "label lines")
(photocopy only)
Basic Human Female Pelvic Features
(photocopy only)
Index
SEX: What Every Young Woman Needs to Know
by William F. Fitzgerald, Ph.D.
Dr. Fitzgerald has been quoted in numerous magazines, including Cosmopolitan, Marie Claire, Bride’s, and New Woman, and in several books. He has been on the radio numerous times, and appeared on television on the Leeza Show as a sex expert, in addition to other television appearances. He has taught dozens of courses, including Human Sexuality, and often speaks to psychology, human sexuality, and gerontology classes, as well as to civic organizations.
This book is designed to provide information about sexuality, possible human behaviors, and some possible personal or social consequences of some behaviors. It is sold with the understanding that the publisher and author are not engaged in rendering psychological, medical, or legal professional services. If psychological, medical, legal, or any other professional services are required, the services of a competent professional should be sought.
Every effort has been made to make this book as complete and as accurate as possible. However, there are may be mistakes, both typographical and in content. Therefore, this text should be used as a general guide and not as the only or the ultimate source of information regarding human sexuality and relationships. Furthermore, this book contains information on sexuality current only up to the printing date. The author sincerely hopes that there will be significant medical or scientific advances in preventing unwanted pregnancy, in treating sexually transmitted diseases, and in helping those with sexual dysfunction..
The purposes of this book are to educate and to entertain. The author and the publisher shall have neither liability nor responsibility to any person or entity with respect to any loss or damage caused, or alleged to be caused, directly or indirectly, by the information contained in this book.
If you wish not to be bound by the above, do not buy this book.
I have chosen to refer to "young women" in the title of this book specifically to avoid suggesting any particular chronological age. Some 15 year-olds will read this book without undue excitement, and some 24 year-old women will be distressed and upset by it. I leave it for others to decide the age of the reader. In addition, I use the term "woman" to mean any human female who is biologically capable of pregnancy.
As the author, I would most prefer that this book be read first by parents, who then give it to their female child, with the invitation to discuss any part of it, and to tailor the contents to their family values. Very often when I give presentations, I find that many adults are seriously uninformed about sexual matters, and believe some things they were taught, some of which are untrue. When asked by a child a question regarding sexuality, a parent will answer what he or she believes to be true, even if it is erroneous. Parents need to be authority figures and they need to be well-informed. If a parent reads this book first, there is less likelihood that the parent will say either "I don't know" or unwittingly provide misinformation.
Technical Acknowledgments (entire text)
Ninety eight per cent of the text of this book was dictated and transcribed using Dragon Systems (www.dragonsys.com) NaturallySpeaking ™ Preferred Edition version 3.52 on an IBM PC clone with a 450 MHz Pentium II processor, 128 megabytes of RAM on the motherboard, using a Turtle Beach Systems (www.tbeach.com) Fiji sound card and an Andrea Electronics (www.andreaelectronics.com) QW 1000 ANC (active noise cancellation microphone) stereo PC headset.
It is clear that scare tactics do not work. Many young people wonder why they were lied to regarding the dire consequences of masturbation. When they pleasured themselves anyway, and didn’t go crazy, grow hair on the palm of their hand, or become cross-eyed, they wondered why grown-ups wanted them to think that. And so the distrust of what grown-ups had to say about sex began to grow.
It is not enough to say that "teenage pregnancy is bad." Kids want to know why. Kids are often literally overwhelmed by the powerful surge of emotions that comes when they are flooded with hormones. They need to acknowledge that, and they need some idea of how to handle it. Kids want to know why they should wait before becoming sexually active. "Because I said so" is not enough.
Good sex is good for you. When you are sexually excited, the pituitary gland in your brain discharges hormones called endorphins into your bloodstream. When you have an orgasm, you get an extra squirt of endorphins. Endorphins enhance your immune system by increasing your white blood cell count, and because they are chemically very similar to morphine, they make you feel good. Some people are so sensitive to endorphins, that they fall asleep almost immediately. If you hear jokes about men falling asleep almost immediately after sex, keep in mind that some of those men are selfish, and others are drugged by endorphins. Furthermore, a gerontologist announced recently that people who have more than 300 orgasms per year live on the average three years longer than their counterparts who do not.
Chapter One Using the correct words: Basic Anatomy (EXCERPT)
Tissue of profound concern to many teenagers is the hymen. The hymen is a membrane that is located at the introitus and can be totally absent, totally present and thick, or have several large or many small holes in it (see page 109). It has no known biological function, and can change shape and thickness for no apparent reason. Women planning to have sexual intercourse can better assure that they will have no discomfort from their hymen by stretching it gently over time using one, then two, then three fingers. If is too thick to be stretched comfortably, consultation with a gynecologist would be appropriate.
It is folklore that "you have to bleed and hurt" the first time you have intercourse, and it is absolutely not a sign that she has been sexually active if a woman has no hymen. This has been the source of great anguish and anxiety, so as a person educated on this topic, please proactively contradict any false information.
Chapter Two Avoiding trouble: The "slanguage" of sex (EXCERPT)
As you read about these slang expressions, the expected emotion is confusion.
Some of them make no sense all. While many children learned at an
early age words such as "shit," "piss" and "cock." it is also common lore
that if you say the "F" word that you could get your mouth washed out with
soap. If you ever hear someone upset and saying that "he didn't need
to say the "F" word," you can be sure they're talking about the word "fuck."
Interestingly, while fuck literally means "have sexual intercourse
with," as in "did you fuck him?" it is also used in a variety of ways,
sometimes with modifiers. For example
"fuck up" used as a verb means to make a mistake or mishandle, as in
"Boy, did he fuck up." When used as a noun, it means someone who
made or makes mistakes, as in "He’s just a fuck up, what do you expect?"
Fuck can also mean interact, mess, confront, or interfere, as in "don't
fuck with me." Fuck can also mean "fooling around" or someone who
fools around, as in "Quit fucking off and get back to work!" or "he
is a fuck-off" (someone who fools around). It can also imply being
in a bad state, where "all fucked up" means that someone is drunk, high
on drugs, badly beaten up, emotionally overwhelmed, etc. And although engaging
in sexual intercourse with someone is supposed be an act of love, affection,
intimacy, and acceptance, if you want to tell someone to "go to hell" more
forcibly, you would say "fuck you." See what I mean about confusing
and not making sense?
Chapter Three Avoiding unwanted pregnancy (EXCERPT)
If you understand this mechanism of preventing sperm from the man's body getting into the woman's vagina, you can speculate how a woman can become pregnant with an almost intact hymen and never having had intercourse. If the tip of the penis is close enough to the entrance to the vagina when ejaculation occurs, it is possible for some of the liquid from the penis to get into the vagina. Some women have unwittingly impregnated themselves by stimulating their lover’s penis using her hand, getting fluid from his penis on her hand when he ejaculates, and then, probably because she is so sexually excited herself, touching herself with the same hand between her legs, unwittingly thus introducing fluid from the tip of the man's penis into her vagina using her own fingers.
Chapter Four Feeling good while feeling guilty: Masturbation (EXCERPT)
For a distinct percentage of young women, what "goes wrong" is that they cannot bring themselves to orgasm. This can be caused by a the wide variety or psychological factors, and by some medical conditions. In many cases, it is the internalization of negative messages, such has "nice girls don’t enjoy sex," and "only sluts have orgasms." If you are nervous, trying to be extremely quiet, feel guilty, or trying too hard, those factors could easily inhibit or prevent orgasm. If you have never been able to achieve an orgasm, try reading the book "For Yourself," by Lonnie Barbach, Ph.D. The women who have had the greatest luck with that book have done absolutely every exercise in it, including those that they thought were too easy. If the self-help approach doesn’t do it, call this problem to the attention of your gynecologist.
Chapter Five I didn’t take any clothes off: Petting (EXCERPT)
The human body is an amazing device, and when sexually stimulated, expects intercourse. Consequently, during sexual stimulation, a man’s penis will become erect, and a woman's vagina will lubricate, both of which are necessary and comfortable to engage in intercourse. Internally, changes occur in the pelvis, and many people, although more males than females, experience discomfort that feels like cramping in the gut if they stay sexually excited for a long time (30 minutes to three hours, depending on the person) without having an orgasm. In men this is called "blue balls," and has been used by many men as a way to pressure their lover into additional sexual activity, resulting in his orgasm. Please be very clear that blue balls can be taken care of by the man having an orgasm, whether by his hand, your hand, your mouth, or any other part of your body. It is definitely not grounds to justify intercourse, and if you don't participate in his orgasm, and if he does not achieve an orgasm himself, the pelvic ache will go away in 10 minutes to two hours.
Chapter Six You don’t have to swallow: Oral sex (EXCERPT)
This section is titled "You don't have to swallow" for the following reason. When a man has an orgasm, he ejaculates semen from the tip of his penis. Because some men find it feels really good for the tip of the penis to be inside a mouth during orgasm, and because some women are especially delighted to sexually please their man, some women will swallow the ejaculate. You don't have to. If you find it distasteful, withdraw your mouth from around the penis when your lover starts to have an orgasm, and it would be a good idea to be ready with a facial tissue to contain the semen (more than one man got in trouble for a semen-stained dress). Lick the back of your hand and blow on it. Notice how cold it feels. The same cooling effect happens to the penis if it is suddenly removed from a mouth with saliva all over it. To diminish the cooling caused by evaporation, wrap the fingers one hand as much around penis as possible, and wrap the facial tissue around tip with the other hand.
Chapter Seven Am I still a virgin?: Anal sex (EXCERPT)
Just as there are substantial differences among people in the height, weight, and frequency of sexual contact, there are substantial differences in individual responsiveness to anal stimulation. At one end of the spectrum, there are women for whom even the thought of anal contact is extremely distasteful, and who report experiencing pain with the slightest of anal touch. At the other end of the spectrum, there are women who have discovered, often in adolescence, that anal stimulation is exquisitely pleasurable, and whether by a finger, the insertion of some object, or the water jets in a Jacuzzi, that it feels really, really good. As with all things, there are plenty of gradations in the middle.
Chapter Eight Going all the way: Penile-vaginal intercourse (EXCERPT)
The essence of intercourse is the presence of a penis inside the vagina. In the search for a black and white dividing line between what is and what is not intercourse, the most common assumption is that if a woman had a hymen, and if the tip of a penis was past the hymen, that would be intercourse. If the tip the penis did not go past the hymen, it would be only "sex play." Please note that nothing is said about moving the penis in and out, or whether either party enjoyed it, or even whether the woman was conscious (the man has to be or he wouldn’t have an erect penis). Furthermore, in the definition of virginity as "absence of a hymen caused by penile penetration," if a woman had intercourse, she is no longer a virgin. If she did not have intercourse, she is still virgin.
The following is the entire text of the last page of the chapter on intercourse:
78 SEX: What Every Young Woman Needs to Know
Maximizing the Intensity of Orgasms: The Kegel Exercise
Want a more profound orgasm? For older patients who voided several drops (or more) of urine when they laughed or sneezed, Arnold Kegel, a California gynecologist, developed an exercise to strengthen the pubococcygeus muscle. Not only was the exercise valuable for retaining urine; patients reported significantly more profound orgasms. In addition, some women who were unable to achieve orgasm were able to do so after strengthening their pubococcygeus muscle by doing the Kegel exercise.
Your pelvis has many muscles in it. To isolate your pubococcygeus muscle, stop the flow of urine mid-stream. It is best to stop the flow of urine only three times, and only during the first half of bladder contents. Some women suggest that it also be described as the muscle you use to stop passing gas (farting).
The Kegel exercise is squeezing the pubococcygeus muscle for three seconds, relaxing it for one second, and repeating that 29 more times. Thirty repetitions of the four second cycle takes two minutes. Do that twice a day, at least four hours apart, every day. In about six weeks, if your pubococcygeus muscle was out of tone before, you will notice a difference. More than thirty repetitions, and more than twice a day, contributes little to the muscle tone.
The strength of the squeeze is about 10 percent more than the muscle force needed to stop the flow of urine. If you are unable to stop flow of urine, which would likely indicate that your pubococcygeus muscle is seriously out of tone, you may need to start with quick squeezes until your pubococcygeus muscle is strong enough.
If you are unable to do 30 repetitions of the four second cycle, do as many as you can comfortably twice a day and add three to five to your count each day. It is strongly suggested that you re-isolate the muscle periodically, by stopping the flow of urine (the Sexdoc does this every morning).
When you have an orgasm, your pelvic muscles contract involuntarily. If there is a penis in your vagina when this happens, and your pubococcygeus muscle is strong, your lover will likely find the strength of the squeeze very stimulating.
Will you invest four minutes a day for the rest of your life to have strong orgasms?
Chapter Nine Cooties and bugs: Avoiding STDs (EXCERPT)
Most sexually transmitted diseases are either a virus or a bacterium. Some people have a sexually transmitted disease and don’t even know it. Some people have an STD and never have any symptoms. They are called asymptomatic carriers. Some people are born with an STD because their birth mother was infected.
Chapter Ten Boundaries and communication (EXCERPT)
For some young men, the objection to wearing a condom has components of rebellion and control. "You can go out and play basketball with your friends after your room is cleaned up, young man." Their mother’s voice controlling their behavior rings in their ears when they hear you say "we can have sex only if you put a condom on." You may hear some young men whine "but honey, it’s like wearing a raincoat in the shower." Some men will stoop so low as to use the "L" word. "Honey, I love you, and if you love me, let’s just do it this once without a condom." The only accurate retort to this statement is "if you truly love me, you will be concerned about my welfare and my quality of life. If we have sex without protection, there is a chance I could get pregnant and that would cause me great anxiety and anguish. Plus, I would be so angry with you that it would terminate our relationship. If you want us to continue to be lovers, I suggest that we always use a condom, and that you don’t try to get me to do something that could be bad for me, especially when it’s based on our feelings for each other."
Chapter Eleven To Be or Not To Be (a virgin) (EXCERPT)
Sometimes, sexual problems cause marital problems, and sometimes, marital problems cause sexual problems. Either way, in the vast majority of divorces, "sexual problems" is cited as one of the top three reasons. Therefore, if you wish to avoid the possibility of sexual incompatibility in marriage, the most effective way to do that is to assess your sexual compatibility by experience. To do that, you need to know your sexual tastes and preferences. To do that, you need sexual experience. The only questions are 1) Before or after marriage, and 2) doing what at what age.
So, how do you go about deciding what you are going to do? In a sense, the first dimension is whether you’re going to consider all the factors, or just do what you want to do when you want to do it, regardless of the consequences.
If you are prudent, and wish to avoid negative consequences, you will consider factors such as your maturity, exactly what you would do if you got pregnant (condom failure or forgetting to take your pill), religious, parental, and societal attitudes, your self-image, your reputation, the effect on the person with whom you might be sexual, and anyone else who might be affected.
Chapter Twelve The unfairness of it all (EXCERPT)
Sexuality is seriously unequal for males and females in American society. Young men are expected to "sow their wild oats," and for a male to be sexually experienced is considered what is "supposed to happen." A young man known to have been sexually active with numerous women is considered a "stud." Young women do not fare as well.
A young woman known to be sexually active with numerous partners is often called a "slut." Much of this comes from history, which has not been kind to women. Historically, women were considered more valuable if they were virgins on their wedding night. The universal evidence of this was if she bled when first penetrated by her new husband, signaling that she had an intact hymen which had been torn by the invading penis. In some parts of the world, relatives would hide in a closet with a recently beheaded chicken, and on hearing the scream from the new bride as a signal, would rush into the bedroom and hastily sprinkle chicken blood all over the sheets to "prove" her virginity. Considering that many women either have no hymen or had one but it resorbed by the time they got married, this practice illustrated substantial sexual and biological ignorance.
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Link to Synopsis
Link to Reviews
Link to TV and Radio Appearances and Newspaper and Magazine Quotations
Link to Fitzgerald's Curriculum Vitae
Link to Background Statement
Link to November 12 News Release
Based, in part, on thousands of questions posed to the author via the internet on www.sexdoc.com, Dr. William F. Fitzgerald, a psychotherapist in private practice in Santa Clara, California, has written this book to help prevent rape, unwanted pregnancy, and sexually transmitted diseases.
Because the book contains specific descriptions of a wide variety of sexual behavior that some adults would be embarrassed to discuss even with their spouse, the author suggests that a parent read the book first, to decide when to offer it to the daughter. The author also endorses this because many parents are unaware of their own sexual ignorance.
After a chapter on basic anatomy, the "slanguage" of sex is presented straightforwardly with an emphasis on knowing what words might imply an erroneous promise of sex. "Avoiding unwanted pregnancy" emphasizes an understanding of how fertilization occurs, then ties that to effective and ineffective methods of birth control.
The chapters on masturbation, petting, oral sex, anal sex, and intercourse will be uncomfortable for many readers, but they contain information that is directly responsive to questions frequently posed by young women.
"Avoiding sexually transmitted diseases" is followed by three chapters that will probably be the impetus for much discussion between parent and child. "Boundaries and communication" strives to empower young women. "To Be or Not To Be (a virgin)," the longest chapter in the book, presents numerous testimonials from women, some of which support pre-marital intercourse, and some of which do not. The final chapter, "The Unfairness Of It All" presents some reasons why sex is such a big deal and why it is such a powerful force in society.
The book is punctuated with what the author calls "factoids" (e.g. Human females are the only primates with permanently swollen mammary glands), off-color jokes, many of which are germane to the topic of the chapter in which they appear, and anecdotes.
The book contains a prefacing statement to both the parent and the young woman. The author concludes the book by repeating the last line in his preface to the young woman: "Thank you for letting me be part of this important component in your life."
"Dr. Fitzgerald's book encourages women to make intelligent choices about their bodies and attempts to prevent women from becoming victims of sexual ignorance. After reading this straight forward yet eloquently written book, I purchased several copies for young women to read in my clinic."
Chance Fisher, M.D.
Central West Center for Reproductive Health
St. Louis, Missouri
"This is a very complete and explicit discussion of
sexuality. It is designed to define, describe and clarify sexuality and
stimulate discussion between parents and teens. It provides vital, factual
information to young people who are inundated with sexuality, but
are often uncertain of what it all really means as
they explore their personal sexuality in a world full of sex. The chapter
titled "The Slanguage of Sex" should be standard reading material for pre-teens
so that they may be less vulnerable to sexual exploitation. I think Dr.
Fitzgerald has taken a bold step to frankly discuss sexuality, in all its
facets. Dr. Fitzgerald encourages women to make intellegent choices about
their bodies and attempts to prevent women from becoming victims of ignorance.
Now young (and not so young) women have a factual resource when making
personal choices for their emerging sexuality."
Mary Pasternaki, R.N., N.P.
Nurse Practitioner
Private Practice, Flagstaff, Arizona
Television and Radio Appearances and Magazine and Book
Quotations – William F. Fitzgerald, Ph.D.
Book Written: October, 1998 "SEX: What Every Young Woman Needs to Know" William F. Fitzgerald, Ph.D. 112 pages, paperback, Menequil Press, San Jose, California
Internet article: This is the link to this internet article: August, 1999, article on Erotica for Women in which Dr. Fitzgerald is quoted.
Internet article: This is the link to this internet article: August, 1999, article in Wired.com News about the Sex Life of Techies in Silicon Valley in which Dr. Fitzgerald is quoted.
Quoted in book: August, 1999 Extraordinary Togetherness: A Woman's Guide to Love, Sex, and Intimacy (the chapter on "Turn Ons and Turn Offs" was based on an extensive interview with Dr. Fitzgerald) Rodale Press
TV appearance: July, 1999 Interviewed by Jim Goldman, KRON-TV Channel 4 (San Francisco) regarding the impact of a product in FDA final testing to increase the sexual response of women (so-called "Viagra for women")
Quoted in book: February, 1999 The Doctors Book of Home Remedies for Men (The chapters on "Being Henpecked" and "[the] Silent Treatment" were based on extensive interviews with Dr. Fitzgerald) Rodale Press
TV appearance: January 22, 1999 Interviewed on KNTV Channel 11 (San Jose) regarding presenting at a seminar titled "Seniors and Sexuality: Myths and Realities."
Quoted in magazine: January, 1999, GLAMOUR Magazine
Radio guest: December 2, 1998 KEST AM Radio, San Francisco on a program titled "The Best of the Best" (in health care)
Quoted in magazine: December, 1998 COSMOPOLITAN Magazine in an article titled: "Me Man, You Woman"
Quoted in magazine: October, 1998 COSMOPOLITAN Magazine in the article "The Case for Quickies"
TV appearance: October 24, 1998 interviewed on KSBW-TV (NBC Affiliate in Salinas, California) on the topic of Senior Sexuality
TV appearance: September 23, 1998 On national television as the sex expert on the LEEZA show (NBC)
Internet article: This is the link to this internet article: July, 1998 Tele-Conference on Sexual Addictions (Link to transcript)
Quoted in newspaper: July 9-15, 1998 METRO (Silicon Valley Weekly Newspaper) "Sexual Healing" This is also an internet article: This is the link to this internet article.
Quoted in magazine: May, 1998 New Woman "Psyched for Sex"
Quoted in magazine: April, 1998 Cosmopolitan
Quoted in magazine: August-September 1997 BRIDES Magazine
Quoted in magazine: May, 1997 Cosmopolitan, page 30 (as an Advisor to the Editor in Chief)
Quoted in magazine: March, 1997 Cosmopolitan, pages 200-225
Quoted in magazine: 1995-1996 Lots of issues of Marie Claire Magazine (and a few issues of Cosmopolitan)
Radio guest: One hour in November and one hour in December, 1995 was a guest on KPIX-FM (San Francisco) answering questions about sex and relationships called in by listeners
Quoted in magazine: November-December 1995 BRIDES Magazine: "Honesty in the Bedroom"
TV appearance: August 17, 1992 Interviewed on KNTV Channel 11 (San Jose) regarding proposed legislation criminalizing Marital Rape
William F. Fitzgerald, Ph.D.
100 North Winchester Boulevard, Suite 364
Santa Clara, California 95050
408/246-7333
Education
1960 - 1962 University of San Diego
1962 - 1963 San Fernando Valley State College
1963 - 1966 San Jose State University
1966 - 1971 University of Chicago
Degrees
B.A. Psychology, San Jose State University 1965
(Bachelor’s Honors Thesis Student)
M.A. Psychology, San Jose State University 1970
Ph.D. Education, University of Chicago 1971
(U.S. Office of Education Graduate Research Training Fellow)
Employment
1971 - 1975 Assistant Professor of Dentistry, University of Michigan
1975 - 1977 Director, Division of Educational Resources and Studies,
American Association of Dental Schools, Washington, D.C.
1977 - 1985 Executive Director, Academy of Stress and Chronic
Disease
1985 - 1987 Director of Training, Electronic Transmitted Mail,
Inc.
1987 - present Psychotherapist specializing in marital and sex
therapy at the Silicon Valley Relationship and Sexuality Center
Professional Membership
American Psychological Association
Selected Presentations
Santa Clara County Adult Probation Department: Increasing Understanding and Effectiveness with Sexual Offenders: A Workshop for Probation Officers (Accepted by the State of California for Continuing Education for Probation Officers)
Santa Clara County Psychological Association: Diagnosis and Treatment of Female Sexual Dysfunction
Santa Clara University Continuing Education: Sexual Trauma, When to Treat, How to Treat
American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists: State of the Art of Treatment of Erection Dysfunction
Grand Rounds at Hospitals: O’Connor, Good Samaritan, Oak Creek, and South Valley
Colleges: San Jose State University: Diagnosis and Treatment of Sexual Dysfunction; Sexuality of the Older Woman, West Valley: General Psychology, DeAnza: Human Sexuality
Expert Witness
Accepted as an Expert Witness regarding sentencing hearings of sexual offenders
Background Information
William F. Fitzgerald, Ph.D.
"Can I get pregnant if I swallow (a man’s sexual fluid)," and "If I didn’t have an orgasm, am I still a virgin?" These questions, and similar ones were the last straw for psychotherapist Dr. William F. Fitzgerald. For over thirty months he has been answering every serious question about sex and relationships received by e-mail from his web site www.sexdoc.com.
No stranger to answering questions, Fitzgerald, who has taught dozens of courses and been a speaker at hundreds of seminars, got the idea for sexdoc.com from serving as a paid expert on the web page of Men’s Health Magazine. When Men’s Health decided no longer to have experts, Fitzgerald registered his domain name and invited questions.
"Sexual ignorance is rampant, parents are inhibited about talking to their kids about sex, young women are getting pregnant and contracting sexually transmitted diseases, and some are getting raped." So Fitzgerald began to compile the questions into subject groups, and organize it into a book. His first book in the "Sexdoc series" as he calls it, is "SEX: What Every Young Woman Needs to Know." Similar books are in the works for young men, women, and men.
Fitzgerald received his Bachelor’s and Master’s degrees from San Jose State, and earned his Ph.D. at the University of Chicago. His path to doing sex therapy was not very straight, however. He was a Professor of Dentistry, an Association Executive, and the director of training at a high tech start-up before joining a group of therapists in Silicon Valley. "In that first group, every time a sex case was referred in, nobody wanted to touch it. Erotic cross dresser, erection problems, women not climaxing, sure I’ll take it" Fitzgerald said. Two group practices later, Fitzgerald sees patients in the Silicon Valley Relationship and Sexuality Center, in Santa Clara, California.
What’s it like being a sex therapist? "It definitely is not, as one of my neighbors speculated, just sitting on your butt talking about sex all day – and getting paid for it! People come in with very real problems and anguish, and exit therapy often engaging in a much wider variety of sexual behavior with each other." Fitzgerald said. He added: "And, there are the touching events like the couples on the verge of divorce who later send me a birth announcement, with a note that says ‘If it weren’t for you this would never have been possible."
-30-
Silicon Valley Relationship and Sexuality Center
100 North Winchester Boulevard, Suite 364
Santa Clara, California 95050
408/246-7333
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
For more information, contact Bill Fitzgerald 408/246-7333
A NEW BOOK TO HELP PARENTS TALK TO THEIR DAUGHTERS ABOUT SEX NOW AVAILABLE
"Sexual ignorance is rampant at all ages, many parents are seriously inhibited when it comes to talking to their children about sex, and young women are getting pregnant and infected with sexually transmitted diseases as a result" says sex therapist and author of this book, William F. Fitzgerald, Ph.D.
November 12, 1999 Santa Clara, California -- The Silicon Valley Relationship and Sexuality Center today announced the availability of a book titled "SEX: What Every Young Woman Needs to Know," written by Dr. Fitzgerald, one of its clinicians. The book is sub-titled "An aid to dialogue between parent and child."
"Sexual misinformation is widespread, and because of embarrassment and ignorance, many young women are uninformed or misinformed about sex. As a result, many are engaging in sexual experimentation without understanding the mechanisms of pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases," Fitzgerald said.
Fitzgerald, an articulate advocate of sex education, has appeared on national and local radio and television, and says this is based on thousands of questions he has received on his pro bono web site, www.sexdoc.com, as well as on information from his patients. He specializes in relationship and sex therapy at the Center.